Tied Down

Hot Swappable

 I have two identical coffee machines. I bought the first one at least 20 years ago. It's a discontinued home espresso machine made by Saeco that was marketed by Starbucks for a time. It looks like this.

I loved this machine. Still do. Still using it.

About ten years after I had purchased my first one, I came across an ad on Craigslist, I think it was, for a used one in Portland, Oregon. I don't remember why the seller was selling it but I jumped on the chance to buy it and was willing to pay full price: $75! (I probably paid around $200 for the first one.)

At the time, this was not only a good price but convenient as I was now commuting between two homes and having the same coffee maker was like having a creature comfort in both places. 

Later, when we consolidated back to living in one home, I had a spare. Which, I have never had to use.

Remember, this model is discontinued as are many of its parts. It's irreplaceable. 

Then, one day, I broke it.

I came around the corner of the kitchen to show Hubby the damage and I saw it in his eyes. The fear. The rising panic. The true and certain knowledge that I could - and probably would - melt down.

Until he remembered and said, "It's a good thing we have a hot swappable."

Indeed, I have not missed a single serving of coffee. And, as it turns out, the broken part was just the plastic scoop for measuring beans. 20-25 years old, it held up for a long time but now it was gone.

Good thing I had an extra one.

"Good thing," sighed Hubby.

“Sorry, honey! I used all the cold water!”

You will never hear those words in Duluth.

You will hear that in southwest deserts of the United States.

Every summer.

By the Numbers

 We recently got back from a two-week roadtrip to the Pacific Northwest, a place where we lived most of our lives and where we first fell in love with beer. (Not to mention each other.)

It was a trip fraught with car problems the entire way. Not exactly ideal. Each time we stopped at an auto repair shop, we tried to evaluate if it was time to retire our 10 year old car with 156,000 miles on the odo. It's a diesel and run likes a champ. Except lately, when it doesn't.

The problems started on Day 2 of our trip. We could have turned around - cancel the whole trip - but we didn't. We pressed on. Things didn't seem all that bad. We arrived at our first destination on Day 4.

On Day 6, we took it to a mechanic. The first of three. 

We were shocked when they told us an axle needed to be replaced. We were also surprised by the cost. It was expensive. We contemplated trading in the car somewhere and buying a new one so we could continue our trip. We also thought about flying to our next destination and onward towards home. We did neither of those things. Two days later, Day 8, we were on the road again and to our relief everything seemed fine.

But then, two hours later, we made a pit stop. As we exited the freeway we heard a sound like we had blown a tire but I had no trouble controlling the vehicle. At our stop, we inspected the tires and everything looked fine. Puzzled, we took it to Mechanic #2 who said one of the tires - the one on the newly replaced axle - just needed rebalancing.

Two hours later, we were on the road again.

Just an hour and a half after that, we pulled over again. Something was not right. The car was shuddering. Enter Mechanic #3.

This time, all four tires were rebalanced. Another two-hour delay. When we finally hit the road, we only made it a couple of blocks before we circled back to Mechanic #3. Things were not better.

With a total of four hours delay for the day, we decided to call it quits and spend the night. We weren't going to make our destination that day. Not for the first time, we contemplated ditching the car forever. Instead, we rented a car and left ours with Mechanic #3. 

This was Day 9 which just happened to be July 3, the day before a long holiday weekend. The mechanics would not be working on July 4. Luckily, they were able to work on it the next day - Friday, July 5. On July 6 - Saturday, Day 11 of our trip - we returned to see if they figured out what was wrong with our car.

Mechanic #3 said the problem with our car was that the new axle fell out. Not all the way out. Just enough to make everything rattle and shake. It wasn't seated properly; it couldn't be. Mechanic #3 said we needed to take it back to Mechanic #1 because the axle they installed was too short. This is why it "fell out." However, he said it was safe enough to drive the 220 miles back to the first mechanic. 

This was nerve wracking.

We called Mechanic #1 but the shop was still closed for the holiday weekend. They wouldn't be open until Monday.

We re-routed our trip, skipping our next intended destination, and backtracked to the first mechanic. We had two days to kill: Saturday and Sunday. Naturally, we found beer. (You can see all the beers we tried on our trip here.)

On Monday, we were on Mechanic #1's doorstep when they opened. (We tried to call ahead but they were closed.) They were just coming off a long weekend and were not thrilled to see customers first thing that Monday morning. They told us they couldn't work us into the schedule right away. Maybe they could do it that afternoon, they offered. 

We insisted. We had already checked out of our hotel and the car was fully packed with two weeks worth of stuff. They could fix it right away or we were going to camp out in their waiting room until it was done. Ten minutes later, the car was on the rack. Shortly after that, we overheard them conferring. Indeed, the axle had fallen out and needed to be replaced again.

A new one was ordered and someone was dispatched to get it. They had us on the road again a couple of hours later. Day 13. 

Day 15 we were home and the car has been fine ever since, all thoughts of disowning it long forgotten. Through it all, we covered

• 3,600 miles
• $3,200 in car repairs
• 28 different beers 
• 14 nights
• 11 breweries
• 8 hotel rooms
• 6 stops for mechanical issues
• half a dozen friends
• 4 states
• 3 auto repair shops
• 2 relatives
• 1 rental car

And one raging case of hemorrhoids, in the end....

Despite the discomfort, the delays, the hand-wringing and uncertainty, the unexpected costs, and a missed stop . . .  despite vows that we'll never do it again, we had a great time because that's what roadtrips are for: surviving the unpredictable. Besides, it could have been worse.

There could have been two raging cases of hemorrhoids.

Do I Have To?

 You know that voice inside your head reminding you that you should probably should exercise more? Ignore her.

With all our recent travel and the extreme heat at home, I've fallen out of my exercise routine which, under different circumstances, consists almost entirely of walking outdoors. I really like walking outdoors. I'll go for miles and miles and miles.

I don't tolerate heat well so it's somewhat paradoxical that I should live in a place where temperatures are easily over 90 degrees for half the year. Right now, in fact, it's over 90 degrees before the sun even comes up. It's just too hot to walk outdoors. Anywhere.

I could walk on a treadmill but that's boring. Besides, it's hard to keep an indoor routine going when we spend the summer traveling. Oh, I have several more flimsy excuses.

That's where that little voice comes in. She reminds me that it's not too hot to swim. In fact, it's a perfect time to swim. Just make a reservation at the pool and do it. Putting it on the calendar will be motivating.

I signed up for a swim lane at the pool. I have it for an entire hour. 

It worked. For a minute. But then I remembered.

I don't like to swim.

Speakeasy

Yellow

My fridge is full of garbage while my freezer is full of Christmas

 I've been out of town the last four Fridays. Which means my garbage hasn't been picked up in a month. To be fair (to be fair), there wasn't much garbage to pick up because we've been out of town. 

However, in the last five weeks, we were home for about ten days. And in those ten days, we produced food waste - aka compost - which is picked up on garbage day.

Well, I wasn't going to just let that sit and rot on my kitchen counter until the next time we were going to be home on a garbage day. So, I put it in my refrigerator to keep it from smelling up the house and attracting bugs. 

But now, because my fridge is half full of beer (collected during said travels), the garbage takes up most of the remaining space. Indeed, there's a chicken carcass in my freezer. 

But speaking of my freezer, I also have an oversupply of Starbuck's Christmas Blend coffee. 

What? It was on sale! I couldn't help myself! Think of it as my version of Christmas in July.

I only have 159 days left to drink what's left of it (before it goes on sale again).

Meanwhile, the garbage goes out today. Not exactly Christmas but close.

Banned Reading

 Yesterday I posted on Facebook. It was roughly five words long - something like, "What's there to be afraid of?" - and a link to yesterday's blog post here on Chocolate Chip Mint.

My Facebook post was banned and removed by Facebook.

According to their website: 

" We do not allow content that is designed to deceive, mislead, or overwhelm users in order to artificially increase viewership. "

You got me. 

In truth, I was trying to artificially increase viewership because who else is going to read this? 

The gist of yesterday's blog post was that I had washed my car and I hoped it wouldn't rain.

For the record, I never designed to deceive or mislead anyone about the fact that I washed my car. 

Five words and a link to yesterday's post is hardly overwhelming.

If It Happens, It's My Fault

It's been raining. Yay! (We need it.)

We had bursts of rain in small patches. On Sunday, one side of town got 1.5" in 30 minutes, while the other side got next to nothing. 

My car was parked outside on Sunday and I was in an area that got rained on. The shower lasted only a few minutes but prompted flood warnings. Yet, by the time I got to my car, everything had dried up and my car was left with rain spots all over it. Boo!

On Monday, some people saw hail (called snow in Pennsylvania) while I saw nothing. 

Today, I washed my car. Yay!

But, I forgot to bring a towel. By the time I got home, my car was covered in spots again. Boo! 

So I washed it again in my garage by hand. I only had to spray it with a little water and wipe it with a microfiber cloth to remove the water spots from the carwash and accumulated dust from the drive home. Yay! 

But I still have to do an errand and fetch some Grin-itch spinach. Boooo....

I just hope it doesn't rain. Noooo!

A Genre With All The Words

Question:

Name any movie in the genre of "made-for-TV, science fiction, action, comedy, horror, disaster." Hint: There was a series of films made in this style between 2013 and 2018.  Per Wikipedia: "The first two films received mixed to positive reviews from critics, while the others received negative reviews." Rotten Tomatoes gives the first film 75%, the second one 61%, and the remaining movies anywhere from 14% to 36%.

Answer:

Sharknado. 

So bad, it's good. 

We stumbled upon it quite by accident because we would have never seen it otherwise. Indeed, we've been actively avoiding the Sharknado movies. The name alone should tell you that it's not worth seeing.

Then, one day, I heard an interview about "Surely You Can't Be Serious: The True Story of Airplane!" by David Zucker, Jim Abrahams, and Jerry Zucker. I thought, that (Airplane!) would be a fun movie to see again.

While I was looking for ways to stream the Airplane!, we came across Sharknado and the only reason we picked it was because we could stream it for free. 

It was entirely worth every penny! 

But then we were hooked. The first one was bad but the second one was elevated to cult level bad. It's like everyone got the joke with the first one and wanted in. The cast of the second movie includes Vivica A. Fox, Richard Kind, Billy Ray Cyrus, Kelly Osbourne, Judd Hirsch, Robert Klein, Matt Lauer and Al Roker, Michael Strahan, Downtown Julie Brown, Kelly Ripa, and so many others.

My recommendation for this Friday's pizza and movie night is Sharknado and Sharknado 2: The Second One. Even more people signed on to be in the third movie, aptly named Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No! If you've got the stomach for it, just keep going. We only made it to the third one. Luckily, there are three more! 

Woo hoo!

Can I Buy A Vowel?

City News - October 14, 2023

Old Town La Quinta will finally be changing its name to OTLQ in keeping with the NVWL Ordinance of 2020 after the city of La Quinta threatened the village with fines and a potential lawsuit.

"They are a full year past the due date for dropping their vowels," said a City Council member who asked not to be identified as she was not authorized to comment. "The vowel shortage is real."

Concerns over vowel shortage began in 1999 concurrent with the supposed Y2K catastrophe that was expected at the end of the millennium. Vowels started disappearing with little notice in the early 2000s but as new restaurants and businesses began to move into Old Town La Quinta at a higher rate than in recent years, the loss of vowels became more widespread prompting the City of La Quinta to take action with the No Vowel Ordinance (officially, NVWLO).

"First there was RD RNNR," recounted our source. "Everyone thought it was weird but for the most part, no one took any particular notice. They - tourists, that is - they would ask 'How do you even say that?'"

Shortly after RD RNNER opened their doors, TQLAS followed with a name change from Taquillas Agave Bar and Grille. "Residents were okay with it but visitors started to complain which is when the Council took action with NVWLO."

DSRT CLUB, which opened earlier this year, was subject to the Ordinance when applying for its business license which was granted without issue. (Vowels are allowed but must be purchased from the City.)

Demonstrators outside La Quinta City Hall is calling for the city itself to change its name. While the Council will be considering the issue after the next election cycle, they have in the meantime put pressure on Old Town to make the change now. Some demonstrators have said this is not enough and have promised to campaign against candidates who refuse uphold the NVWLO.

While a date has not been officially announced, the name change from Old Town La Quinta to OTLQ is expected to happen before the end of the year.

El día próximo ...

We met a man from Venezuela. Another visitor from yet another country to rock out to some heavy metal music in the desert. His English was a lot better than my Spanish so I didn't even try. 

Nevertheless, I'm pretty impressed that "Power Trip" turned out to be such an international draw.

Fantástico!

Ayer

Algo muy interesante ocurrió ayer. 

Something very interesting happened yesterday.

Estuve aprendiendo español durante 150 días con Duolingo. Ya había estudiado español durante muchos años en la escuela cuando tenía aproximadamente quince años. ¡Han pasado cuarenta y cinco años desde entonces! Pero decidí que quería practicar mi español y aprender más. 

I was learning Spanish for 150 days with Duolingo. I had already studied Spanish for many years in school when I was about fifteen years old. Forty-five years have passed since then! But I decided that I wanted to practice my Spanish and learn more. 

Y ayer, tuve la oportunidad de practicar lo que había aprendido. 

And yesterday, I had the opportunity to practice what I had learned.

Hay un "dive bar" en mi pueblo. Es pequeño, oscuro y no es elegante. Las bebidas eran baratas y los baños eran muy pequeños. Se llama "Club 5." Pero este fin de semana, el nombre cambió a "High Voltage AC/DC".

There is a "dive bar" in my town. It is small, dark and not elegant. The drinks were cheap and the bathrooms were very small. It's called "Club 5." But this weekend, the name changed to "High Voltage AC/DC."

La razón es que la banda AC/DC está aquí en nuestro pueblo para el concierto "Power Trip". Es una fiesta de bandas de rock durante todo el fin de semana, y AC/DC es una de ellas. Es la banda favorita de mi esposo. 

The reason is that the band AC/DC is here in our town for the "Power Trip" concert. It's a party of rock bands all weekend long, and AC/DC is one of them. It's my husband's favorite band.

Vi en Instagram que era posible conocer a los miembros de la banda en este bar. No sé si era verdad, pero fui al bar de todos modos. 

I saw on Instagram that it was possible to meet the band members in this bar. I don't know if it was true, but I went to the bar anyway.

Hacía mucho calor, pero había mucha gente allí. ¡Eran personas de todo el mundo en este pequeño bar de nuestro pequeño pueblo! Venían de Ecuador, Reino Unido, Australia y hay un hombre de Chile. Seguramente también había muchas otras personas de muchos otros lugares. 

It was very hot, but there were many people there. They were people from all over the world in this little bar in our little town! They came from Ecuador, the United Kingdom, Australia and there was one man from Chile. Surely there were also many other people from many other places.

El hombre se sentó con nosotros y nos dijo que no hablaba inglés. ¡Pero yo hablo un poco de español! ¡Era una oportunidad perfecta para practicar para ambos! Él podía practicar su inglés y yo podía practicar mi español. No fue perfecto, pero nos entendíamos. 

The man sat with us and he told us that he didn't speak English. But I speak a little Spanish! It was a perfect opportunity to practice for both of us! He could practice his English and I could practice my Spanish. It wasn't perfect, but we understood each other.

Fue muy divertido pero no conocimos a la banda. ¡Tal vez hoy!

It was fun but we didn't meet the band. Maybe today!

Hilary

 

This video shows some of the damage in the Coachella Valley area. While dramatic, especially to those affected, it could have been much, much worse.

We are fine.

Hurricane Preparedness

With the advent of Hurricane Hilary, the townspeople are on the verge of panic. News outlets warn of flooding, evacuations, and rescues. Flights have been canceled and stations have been set up for obtaining sandbags.

The campus restaurant has closed!

Hubby went to the hardware store at eight o'clock this morning to buy an inverter where there was already a line out the door with people buying generators. He plans to use the inverter to connect the golf cart batteries to the refrigerator for a backup power source.

Wait, I said. What will be the backup power source for the coffee maker?

He shrugged his shoulders not sensing my rising panic. 

Afterwards, he went about making sure the garage floor was clear of anything that could be damaged by water while I made enough cold brew coffee to last a week. While he verified our first aid supplies, I ground some extra coffee to make coffee in my French press should the cold brew run out. While he taped up our plate glass windows, I confirmed all the coffee cups were clean. While he filled the bathtub with water so we could flush toilets, I filled empty containers with water for - well, water. Also, for coffee.

In case of evacuation, tire pressures have been checked, fuel topped off, and blankets and warm clothes are stowed. The coffee travel mugs are secured in their cupholders.

When the neighborhood restaurant closed, I hightailed it to Total Wine!

We have COVID-level amounts of toilet paper, plenty of canned food, lanterns, and Scrabble. All of the devices have been charged. And, if worse comes to worse, I have about five pounds of coffee beans in the freezer that I can just gnaw on.

We should be fine.

Will work for stars

The stars aligned this week. I'm not talking about the picket line in Hollywood or the Perseid meteor shower. I'm talking Starbucks.

They have my number, Starbucks does, with their stars. I support craft beer but I don't have the same loyalty toward craft coffee. Why? Because of those damned stars. 

(If my boss had figured out that I was motivated by stars, he would have retained my services a lot longer. Too late for that now.)

This week, three Starbucks promos overlapped. The first one promised 35 bonus stars if I bought something - anything - from them two days in a row inside of a week. Honestly, I don't usually go to Starbucks all that often and I never go two days in a row except when I'm traveling. 

When I went to the grocery store on Sunday, there was a Starbucks inside so it was easy. I went again Monday because, well, there was the matter of 35 stars to be had.

Before the end of the week another promo was offered that overlapped with the first one. It promised 60 more stars if I went three times in the following seven days. It's crazy to go to Starbucks three times in a week. But, because of the overlap, I earned 35 stars on Monday on the first promo while simultaneously logging the first of three coffees on the second promo.

Tuesday, was triple stars day. That meant for any purchase, I earned triple the amount of stars that I would normally get on any other day. Heck, yeah, I went! I bought a latte and two breakfast sandwiches!! I earned triple stars for Tuesday's purchase and and was one day closer to earning another 60 stars on the second promo. Are you getting all this?

Wednesday, I went yet again! I don't know why except maybe I was drunk on stars at the time. This time, I not only got all the stars from all the promos, Starbucks tossed me the keys to my own freaking' franchise!

I'm just rolling in stars now, baby! Woo hoo!!

Pet Peeve

My pet peeve is poop. Particularly, pet poop. More particularly, my peeve is the pet's person who permits poop in public places. Please, pick up your pet's poop!

One such person perpetually permits its pet to poop near a perimeter gate. The person scoops the poop in a bag and places it purposefully in a pile. With persistence, the pile grows each passing day. Until another person - me - personally picks up the pile and puts it in its proper place. This is quite unpleasant.

There is a pause in the pattern when the person, and, presumably, the pet, pass from this place making my performance somewhat non-permanent. But when the perpetual pooper, from whatever place they perchance visit, returns to this place their pet's perpetual pooping pattern persists.

Please! If a person is permitted to own a pet, said person should be prepared to scoop its pet's poop and place it in its proper receptacle. If said person cannot be personally responsible for its pet they should not be permitted to be a pet person, in my personal opinion. Without opposable thumbs, pets cannot be responsible for their own poop. Therefore, the onus is placed on the pet's person to perform this unpleasant duty.

While I perform this perfunctory duty on behalf of keeping this place pretty, I do so under perpetual and petulant protest.

Portland is Sustainably Weird

You know you've landed somewhere weird when people take pictures of the airport carpet. That's just what they do in Portland.

The carpet pictured here is the new airport carpet. The one it replaced, the old carpet, was famous. Go ahead, look up Portland Airport Carpet. Among other things, it has its own Wikipedia page. 

I digress. What makes Portland weird is not the carpet. That's just the introduction to what makes Portland weird. In fact, if you were flying in to Portland from another country, the test at Customs is whether or not you take a picture of your feet on the carpet. If you don't, then you can't come in.

The last time I was at the Portland airport, I saw an emotional support duck. It was a Mallard, to be precise. It was being pushed in a dog stroller (much like this one) only instead of a dog, it was a duck. It was zipped into its stroller but I could see through the mesh. It was definitely a duck. It quacked. 

I wondered if it had been on my flight*. Or, if it had taken a different flight. Did it fly with other ducks? Were they in formation? Did they have humans, too?

Don't laugh. While ducks aren't recognized by the ADA as service animals, ducks can provide emotional support. Well, not to me. But they can to Carla Fitzgerald. She traveled with her duck, Daniel, and became an overnight sensation. 

That was a few years ago. Carla and Daniel are both older now. Maybe Daniel needs more support now than Carla. Maybe it was Daniel in the stroller.

That was weird enough. I didn't even bother to go into the city of Portland. I crossed the river into Washington. It's a little less weird there. 

To be clear, we were in Washington State, not Washington DC. 'Cuz it's really weird there!

*It was not. I checked the website for Southwest Airlines. They only allow dogs and cats on their flights. (And humans.)

True Enough

I read this blog post on 76003.1414 about people walking backward and how it could improve one's mental and physical health. To his delight, he imagined that if this caught on, people would be walking backwards everywhere.

The article behind the blog post, Could walking backwards be the secret to physical and cognitive health?, recommended "that people walk backwards for shorter periods of time and that they create resistance by dragging something while they walk." 

For me, this evokes a vision of people dragging unknown heavy objects rolled up in carpet. The blogger's idea that it could simply be a shopping cart may be a better idea.

While it may not have caught on with the population at large, if you were to stop by my house just before bedtime you would find its occupants indeed walking backwards. For exactly two minutes and again in the morning while we brush our teeth.

We've gotten quite good at it. The challenge - and the cognitive benefit, I would assume - increases significantly when we are both walking backwards around the house at the same time. Knocking on wood, we have yet to trip over furniture or the edge of a rug and fallen to smash our skulls resulting in more of a physical detriment than an improvement. On the other hand, if one of us fell, the other one could drag the first one's body to even things out but let's hope it doesn't come to that.

I grin each night to think someone - perhaps this blogger - might spy in a window and catch a glimpse of our evening routine. Anyway, that should scare any potential intruders away.

In fact, they might back away improving their own cognitive abilities. Then, who knows? Maybe it will catch on.