Say It Isn't So

The premier source of inspiration for procrastination, and the ultimate waste of time, faces a nearly eminent shutdown. The Chief Inactivist of the blog "76003.1414" (where one can enjoy "world-class work avoidance" among other things) has announced his desire to take a much needed nap.

76003, in its current form, originated in 2005. However, its inception dates back to1998, before the word "blog" even existed. In 2009, it became the inspiration for the blog "back(b)log" which is a mostly defunct site originally created to chronicle one person's journey with back pain. That blog led to two others. This one, "Chocolate Chip Mint" (started in 2010), and "Beer Here" (2017). These three blogs, combined, have not equaled the success of 76003 with roughly 450,000 total hits compared to 1.66 million.

76003 has mostly been a news blog or, rather, a running commentary on the news of the day. It has also been a place where stories from long ago were memorialized (sometimes with audio recordings by the Chief Inactivist himself), photos were posted, and contributions from correspondents throughout the world and beyond were shared. It's been both funny and insightful.

I happen to know the author and Chief Inactivist of 76003.1414 quite well and I know he is a wonderful storyteller, historian, tech guru, and an intelligent commentator on the news, politics, and events of the day. He is also a man who has done an exceptional job of letting his family know that they are loved.

It's understandable that he's tired and grumpy from the state of things as they are today. While one can hope he will awake from his nap and declare 76003's closure was just a dream, one can also hope he spends his much earned time off to write his memoirs.

Onward.

Here, hold my salad!

 . . . is never the start of a great story.

Case in point: Hubby said to me the other day, "Here, hold my salad!"

We both bust a gut laughing because everyone knows, a really great story never begins with that. I thought, "I need to write about this!"

The next morning I found the note I left for myself which read, "Here, hold my salad!" I asked Hubby, "What happened after that? I can't remember."

"Nothing," he answered. "I just needed to free a hand to dig the car keys out of my pocket."

And there you have it: No great story ever starts with "Here, hold my salad!" even if a story really does start with "Here, hold my salad!"

What’s my dream job?

I was with a group of women when this questions was asked by way of an icebreaker. The idea was introduce yourself and tell a little something about yourself. 

It reminds me of a time when we were with our sister-in-law (who, coincidently, has both my first and last names). We were in a small bar. So small, that it was impossible not to get to know your fellow drinkers.

We might not have been on our first beer when my sister-in-law proposed that we should ask everyone in the bar three questions:

1) What was your first job?

2) Have you ever been fired?

3) What's your go-to karaoke song?

The most interesting answer came from a woman who was dressed in a bathroom having just come from the hot tub. She started signing Adele or some such thing and blew our minds. She was amazingly talented.

Now the question was, "What is your dream job?" And I was seated to the left of the person who asked it.

If I had answered first, I might have said "Ninja." I was relieved when someone a few seats to my left volunteered the first answer.

The sad truth is that I wanted to become an accountant at a very young age and I became one. Not very exciting.

Everyone else in this group of women picked exciting things like singer, dancer, actor, or film producer.

I was nearly the last to answer and said, "Writer." Humorist, if you wanted to be specific. 

I think the truest answer would be "Extrovert" if that was a job. Singer, Dancer, or Actor - even Ninja - would be roles that would require a certain projection of self which, generally, is not my bag. Thus, it would be a dream of mine to be able to do any of those things. Writer is the closest I can get to expressing myself but, really, that is a solitary endeavor. I can be seen and unseen at the same time. It's safe.

Being an introvert is part of what made me a good accountant. I wasn't a CPA and I didn't deal with people. I just dealt with numbers. 

Being an introvert makes me a good long distance walker/runner/biker. I like people but in the end I will go the distance alone.

New situations or situations that require that I put myself out there scare the crap out of me (although I have been known to sing karaoke from time to time. "Crazy" by Patsy Cline is my answer to Question #3, above.)

So, what's my dream job? I don't know. A ninja who writes funny things? I would like to be fearless when I walk in a room sometimes but other than that, I think I already have the dream job of just living my life.

Shout out to my sista-from-another-mister and my entire family and my friends for making my life meaningful. There's nothing better than that.

On second thought . . .

My 12 year old granddaughter told me she wants to live with me so I asked her, “Why?” 

She said, “Because Dad is so annoying.”

"Annoying? That’s literally in the job description," I said. "He’s supposed to be annoying."

"Yeah, but he’s so annoying." She pleaded, "I could help you clean the house. I would always do my homework. We could go swimming. I could help you bake cookies and bread because, face it, you're not that good at it."

I asked her, "Who do you think taught him to be annoying?"

After a moment of thought, she said, "Yeah, I might not want to live with you."

Good thinking.

My weather vane is a turtle.

This is what it looks like on a clear, sunny day. There is a smaller turtle on the turtle's back, an elephant on its head, and a little green Army guy on the back of its neck.

On a windy day, it looks like this:

Can you find the elephant and the Army guy?

On a really windy day, you'd have to go looking for the little turtle as well.

It's been said that it rained last night but I didn't capture how it was reported by the turtle vane. First of all, I slept right through it and, secondly, I didn't want to disturb the nesting hummingbird outside my sliding glass door.

By the time I woke up and the hummingbird took flight to forage, everything had dried up anyway.

[No new activity to report in the nest, btw.]

 

In case you're following along

 ... this is an update on the hummingbird nest.

The nest itself has been fortified. It looks more like nest and less than a tiny beehive. The hen (for I presume the bird is female) has been sitting on the nest more, keeping perfectly still. I have rarely seen a hummingbird so motionless. She is very small with non remarkable plumage (dark brown/gray). 

My guess is she's laid her eggs, possibly two, which means we could seem impossibly small chicks as early as next week.

I'll keep an eye on it. (If I had a better camera, you'd be able to keep an eye on it, too.)

Just something I'm playing around with

 

Progress on the nest

 

It's very difficult to see in these photos - I really need a telephoto lens to get a better image - but, the gist of it is the nest (left photo) has been expanded and reinforced. It's less of a sack and more of the bowl shape that you might expect a nest to look like.

The hummingbird is sitting in the nest in the right photo. She was very still - more still than I've ever seen a hummingbird - almost as if she was asleep.

The images are much clearer with my binoculars but I haven't figured out a way to take a picture through the binocular lenses.

I'll be out of the office for the rest of the week so I won't be able to post any updates on the nest for a few days. I'll be sure to check on it as soon as I'm back.

Not nearly as gripping as a live camera on an eagle's nest, is it?