I plan to be ghostwriting greeting cards as my next career. I've been sending little love notes to a friend of mine on a monthly basis, always addressing her as Cupcake and always signing it as Your Secret Admirer with no return address. She knows it's me. Her husband knows it's me, too.
Still, he's jealous. She looks forward to my card every month and then she shows it to everyone she knows.
I won a package of cupcake greeting cards at a bingo game that she and I both attended. The game was actually called Dirty Bingo because sometimes you could win a prize and sometimes you could steal a prize from someone else. Somehow I ended up with this package of twelve gaudy cards that featured cupcakes, glitter, and lots of pink. Not my style by a long shot.
My friend wanted them but I wound up with them instead so I told her she could have them - one at a time. I told her I'd mail her one every month for a year and when another friend suggested the cards should be sent from a secret admirer the deal was on.
The messages aren't racy. They're just cute messages of desire and longing for a dessert, really, with themes that center on the events of the month - usually whatever holiday is presently occurring.
I told her husband that when the last card is gone, I could write new ones that are signed by him.
Cyrano de Bergerac meets Hallmark.
Anyone need a secret admirer?