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Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Employee Benefits

My employer has installed a latte filled gerbil feeder just above my monitors. It's brilliant, really. I mean, I am really, really focused here. I can't wait to do tax returns - literally. I don't know how they can keep it warm for so long but it takes all day to drink it, one drop at a time. Oh man, is it good! I used to suck my coffee down in about 15 minutes and then spend the rest of the day moping around because it was all gone. No more! Now, I get coffee all day and I don't ever have to leave my desk.

Hey, wait a minute. What's this exercise wheel for?

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